Can fans suck air in rather than blow air out?
Are stars really light bulbs so far away in the universe that we see them as tiny lights twinkling in the distance?
Could all the lovers and friends that you have known come back in a flash and all be waiting for you downstairs for tea?
Can time stand still when we slowly take back the words we don’t want to say but still do and wish we hadn’t?
Will roads move into the sky as cars become airplanes?
Can a man write or sing without the fear of being put down by other people around him for their lack of initiative and not doing anything productive or surprising?
Can we avoid not correcting what we once wrote?
Could anger and pain and fear and everything else just be words and not felt?
Can fame touch me in the fifteenth minute of the fifteenth day of the fifteenth-month?
Can the year have 20 months?
Can you not laugh and think this is unwanted?
Is there one huge soundtrack for life?
Can phone calls ring inside your head?
Can lunch be had for dinner?
Can Mondays not be called Mondays?
Can people have a good and bad meter?
When the bad meter reaches a limit and then good takes over?
Can orphans all over the world be called a family?
Can music be played in outer space?
Can sound be heard with a smile?
Can I come back and continue rambling?
Can magic happen?
Can animal be used to describe a person who’s more civilized than a human?
Can we touch sound?
Can water be an intoxicant?
Can pants be reinvented to look more like jeans?
Can lies be detected by loud beep with a red light on the top of your head?
Can kids have their own planet?
Can there be fewer questions?
And more answers?
Can the highway run through the office?
Can raindrops be an aphrodisiac?
Can cancer be a cold that goes away?
Can miracles come in through the post?
Can a question end with an answer?
Is a kid an adult shrunk to fit?
Are dogs nicer people because they have a shorter lifespan?
Why do people fight?
If you were homeless and hungry would you look at the homeless and hungry differently?
Can flowers grow into the sky?
Have you ever heard the sky complain?
Is the sea a place where all your dreams are wet?
In heaven will angels play the blues or rock n’ roll?
Is forever a long time?
Can a reason be no reason at all?
Do animals know they’re naked?
Can you write a long story and throw it away before anyone else reads it?
What if everyone was running to work?
Will tomorrow make a difference?
Is madness a place were people have cable connections but no remote?
Are words parallel universes?
Will you ever read this to someone on a rainy may morning?
Will you buy me a beer once this is done?
Can people be paid for sleeping?
Why are floors cold?
Can you not try to answer that scientifically?
Are beaches portals to other planets?
Did anyone ever reply to that mail you sent?
Did you return that call?
Did Jesus ever do push-ups?
Is anger a joke gone out of control?
Will you publish my book?
Do sad people make funny faces by themselves?
Have you ever wished so hard for something you never got?
Is love the reason we’re here?
Do elephants wear jogging shoes?
Do you need reservations to go to heaven?
Will the parking be full there?
Are all people inherently nice?
Are people with beards bored of shaving?
Do birds take the bus home from work?
Is this boring you?
When the wind whispers in your ear do you listen quietly?
Where do lost things go?
Do they have a heaven?
Wouldn’t everyone on this planet have lost something or the other?
Can paperclips be the answer?
Does never ever come?
Is someone making the world spin?
Is he getting dizzy?
What takes you to the point of no more?
Can dancing give you hope?
Are you trying to be clever?
If it’s the human race then why aren’t you running?
Is the end of a paragraph the start of a new one?
Is stupidity profound if you look at it the right way?
Is temporary a place where nothing stays the same?
Has God commissioned a writer to script out your life?
Is crazy a word that can be used in a sane world?
Do you believe in magic?
Can you be frank without changing your name?
Is patience something that takes a long time to get?
Will a group of people who disagree on everything jointly agree on dis agreeing?
Doesn’t anyone use full stops anymore?
Do animals listen to music and talk to their friends about it?
Do roads really go anywhere?
Can you walk to the edge of the universe and not fall off?
Do plants ever go green with envy?
Will the questions ever stop?
But why should they?
Does anyone really care?
Is this the place where dreams come true?
Can you answer my questions?
Can we share the world that we have?
Are children the ones with the answers?
Why am I like this?
Do I need help?
Are theses words places where thoughts can hide?
Can I go on like this?
Is love dead?
Is love alive?
Is love the reason why we’re here?
Can I stay here?
Can I love again?
Am I in love now?
Are you reading this?
Or have you gone to sleep?
Are you dreaming?
Are angels watching over you?
Have you forgotten to do something today?
Will you do it tomorrow?
Or the day after?
Will you remember to do it?
Or should I remind you?
Did you brush your teeth in the morning?
Why can’t we brush our teeth in the middle of the night?
Or not brush our teeth at all?
Can I keep writing to fill up this page?
Would you really care?
Have you paid money to read this?
Will this whole thing look better if it’s set in a bigger typeface?
Is this the day before tomorrow?
Why do people dream?
Do dogs dream?
Why do we eat food?
Why do we become greedy?
Why are people biased?
Is work the wrong way to live?
Will you ever save the world if you’re stuck in a meeting?
Is money everything?
Are our hands actually legs?
If dreams are sweet why can’t we taste them?
Can you hands be used for walking?
Wouldn’t it be great if all people were blind and deaf and dumb?
Would we help each other then?
Would we lead each other?
Has God dug that ditch we’ll fall into?
Are God and the Devil in cahoots?
Is a spelling mistake really a mistake?
What if the correct spelling's a mistake too?
Don’t you just love the sound of the acoustic?
Why are we so close to other humans?
Are you looking out the window?
What happened to my childhood?
Is it still there?
Can you please bring it back for me?
Is Tull any good?
Do you like the stuff they do?
Is there a copyright on love?
Why don’t people smile at other people?
Would they do it if they got paid for it?
Can people be paid to sleep at work?
Can you imagine an entire office sleeping at work?
Would I be hard work?
Why are all pigs painted pink I cartoons?
What is a movie?
Is it s subconscious attempt at reason in a world filled with none?
Is this the sentence to give faith to all other sentences in a world of unconnected sentences?
Would you start a sentence with and?
And why would you do that?
Isn’t it a crime?
Where is God?
Is he here?
And why do you always start His name in capital?
Does He have a Wife?
Are we their kids?
Do you have family pictures?
Can I learn all the chords on the fret board?
Is a new day the start of something new?
What if I woke up early on a Sunday?
Are you drinking enough water?
Would this make one boring book?
Why do people keep secrets from each other?
Do I have to keep speaking to myself?
Are these questions answers in disguise?
Can I have one more chance?
Why do you want to let it go?
Do wishes come true?
Is there love on the other side of the river?
Is there a river on the other side?
Is there another side to the river?
Is there love there?
Is there someone inside you asking you a question?
Can you ignore that question for much longer?
What is it asking you?
Why is there so much air?
Why isn’t anyone breathing?
Why do I feel sleepy all the time?
Do you think I could go on like this?
Am I really any good at this?
What am I good at?
Are empty pages masterpieces that we have to unfill?
Is this already written in the stars?
Did they really land on the moon?
Why am I so lazy?
Is laughter the best medicine?
Have you had it today?
Does a poet really need the pain?
Can’t he have an aspirin instead?
Is purpose a word with ambition?
Is ambition a word with purpose?
Is life an interruption to living?
Is ha a funny word?
Or is ha ha funnier?
Do you think this is a waste of time?
Or is it worthwhile?
Why do we try to outsmart each other?
Is a habit?
Is a friend of mine reading this?
Is he or she recommending this to someone else?
Can someone tell me where I am?
Does anyone know where they are?
Do you think I should stop?
Who do you think you are anyway?
Should I write this down or type it out straight away?
Do they have animal police?
Is never a place we’ll never see?
Does a candle lit in one part of the world give light to another part of the world?
Are sleep clouds that walk?
Do dogs talk to each other about taking their masters for a walk?
Do birds play in a band in the evening?
Is magic a reversal of reality?
Can you run around in circles and not fall down?
Are my Parents Gods in disguise?
Is love a drug?
Are all creatures hooked onto to it?
Do cars complain to the roads about going on long drives?
Are cows really jazz musicians?
Would you like to take a walk while I keep writing?
Are they more questions out there?
Do you really think so?
Is wasting time really a waste of time?
Do barbers cut their own hair?
If they do, how do they cut the hair at the back?
Do you irritate people by creaking your chair over and over again?
What if a star fell down into your loo?
Would you flush it away, frame it or sell it to a museum?
If water is running where does it go?
Do you remember all those things you learned in school?
Do you remember the sunlight on your way to the football field?
Do you remember your friends?
Do you wish you where there again?
Do you colour inside or outside the lines?
Do you dance all by yourself?
Is music everywhere?
Are we not really listening?
Should I leave the rest of this page empty?
Can I tap into my subconscious more often?
Do you have the answers?
Can you send them to me?
Can you keep a secret?
Where will you keep it?
Do you think about your old love?
And the promises you made?
What ever happened to those promises?
Where is fame?
Is it around the corner?
How does it look?
Will I know it if it hits me in the face?
Do you need to be lucky to have luck?
Or will plain luck do?
Where are the angels they promised?
Is one sitting next to me?
Is God invisible?
Can I see God if I try hard?
Do fish dream of a dry day?
Do butterflies every cry?
Does the earth know that humans are going nuts?
Is evolution and extinction the way the cycle moves?
Can it be changed with a little thought and understanding?
How many hours do you sleep?
Do you dream of childhood days?
Aren’t they great dreams?
Why do people screw up other people’s trips?
Do they really have to that?
Why do you always think you’re smarter than the person next to you?
Has it become a habit?
Will I ever finish this book?
Are there any answers hidden in the middle of all these questions?
Aren’t jokes really funny things?
Have you heard the one about the horse and the priest?
Why do people fight?
Why do birds fly?
Does that answer you question?
Does heaven have a pub?
Is there a sea in heaven?
Do people live in clouds there?
What are you thinking of right now?
Why can’t pencils come with built in ideas?
Where do rubbers go when they die?
Are they erased?
Why do you always think so much?
Have you ever stopped to listen at the blind man singing on the road?
Do frogs listen to hip hop?
Do flowers change colour after they inhale the factory fumes?
Why is man the dumbest animal of them all?
What if you’re one of the characters in the video game played by some kid sitting in a video game parlour with a running nose?
Do bats play cricket?
Do crickets know how to bat?
Are sparrows trained fighter pilots in disguise?
Do you really think God has a plan for you?
What if it a re-run?
What if it’s one long joke?
Can I end this question with an answer?
Did you see that?
Does love stay in a lonely hotel room down the road?
What if love and hate are really good friends?
Why can’t words be pictures?
Or are they pictures that are painted in your mind?
Does your name have to be the same everyday?
What if you’re really a child wearing grown up clothes?
Do dreams come for a reason?
Or are they just entertainment?
Can God really help us out?
I think it’s been a while?
How about now?
Will night turn into day and vice-versa forever?
Why does that happen everyday?
What if the sun shone at night for a change?
Do dogs ever disco?
Why are you laughing?
What if we could pick the life we wanted to live from a library?
Have your ever tried sleeping on the wall?
Do you know how to pick a lock?
What if it rained right now?
Wouldn’t it be great?
Have you ever fixed a drink by holding your glass up to the sky when it’s raining?
If you knew the answer to life would you share it with me?
If you had enough to eat would you give you food to someone else?
Is five minutes on earth five hundred years on another planet?
Do you have five minutes to spare?
Is your memory always that good?
Why do we make so many mistakes?
Have we ever learned from any of them?
Must have been a good mistake huh?
Did summer ever spring a surprise on you?
Or was it autumn?
What if God called when you were in the loo?
Would he call you back?
What is this whole thing about?
anyways, i was at borders this afternoon and that kinda cheered me up. i looove bookstores! in fact i love them so much that i'm thinking of working in one or (if retirement money permits) have my own bookstore when i retire. ha ha, i wish!
i don't know, bookstores have this atmosphere that keeps me at ease. they're diffrent from libraries. libraries are constricting, bookstores aren't. i noticed that everytime something is bothering me or if i am getting restless with life in particular, browsing through the racks and shelves of books calms me and relieves my stress. this was even when i was still in pinas. when i have a misunderstanding with a co-worker or with my mom or whatever was bothering me before, it's always national bookstore to the rescue.
when i was in pinas, a mall trip for me is incomplete without a stop at national bookstore or even a second hand bookstore such as booksale or was it bookshop? when i meet up with my friends or with my sister after work, the meeting place would always be at a national bookstore. i don't know why? we probably thought it was less painful waiting up for someone who is an hour late if you're distracted by the books... he he.
i've always thought that i would stop buying books when my bookshelves wouldn't have room left in them. wrong! my books are now piling up on my bedroom floor and i still went home today with a copy of neil gaiman's anansi boys from borders. go figure. when i came here three years ago, i practiced as much restraint not to bring all my books along with me. of course my sister was the happiest because i had to leave most of them to her. she made up for it though because when i came home a year after, i brought most of her books with filipino authors back with me to the states.
i don't know if i'll ever get tired of reading. i guess i won't. but lately my schedule has been so terrible that reading a chapter or two in one sitting is out of the question. damn i miss my books!
i have to thank a lot of people who made my first cruise a memorable one for me (naks! parang nanalo ng award!).
Joyce, who made it possible for us to book a cruise with the help of the Liberty travel person, you're the best! thanks for putting up with me and hannie.
Hannie who was a delight to be on a cruise with despite her having symptoms of ADHD whenever we are thinking on what to do next (he he he!). swak talaga ugali natin dalawa.
all the folks we dined with on table number 178 of the imagination dining room, you guys were very nice!
the filipino band who plays every night in romeo and juliet who gamely lent us their instruments just so we could have a feel of how it is to be rockstars, mga kuya... all of you rock!
to the kuya who served us drinks and gave us discounts and freebies every time, ha ha... hindi mo kami nalasing!
to the guys who made our beds and cleaned our room everyday and gave us a reason to smile by creating animals and stuff out of towels, we thank you. george gives you an extra hug too because you gave him company on the times when the three of us were out on the deck or exploring the ship.
to the old lady from new jersey who gave us encouragement on our very first attempt on snorkeling...waah! i still wanna be able to snorkel when i get to your age.
to the regulars of the karaoke bar... grandpas johnny, jr and i forgot the other guy's name, thank you for giving us entertainment on the nights that we were there. you rock too... in your own geriatric way he he he.
to the kayak guide for being very patient with joyce and hannie on their first kayak stint, you taught them well. now their looking forward to another kayak adventure..he he.
to the people who were kind enough to agree to become our photographer on some of our shots, thank you. without you there wouldn't be a trio in our pictures.
to all the pinoy staff of the ship, ang galing nyo! excellent service, keep it up!
and to all the characters and faces we met during the cruise... si friend who is fond of dancing with choreography, the african-americans who dominated the dancing floor and the karaoke bar most of the time and the numerous drunken people who amused us every night... one big thank you for making the experience memorable.
now if you don't wanna read my ramblings and my thank you's to people and just wanna get to the good stuff, you can go HERE and i'll let the pictures tell you all about it.
i have a love hate relationship with the days that i'm not working. i love it because i wouldn't have to think about hospital stuff and i could just bum around at home. i hate it because i tend to eat a lot when i'm at home and when i say a lot... i mean a lot! i would be watching tv or reading and i would think about what's good to eat. a few seconds later i'm raiding our fridge and heating things up in the microwave. this is so bad it kills me! here is an example... a pandan pancake that i made at 5 in the morning because i had nothing to do but tinker in the kitchen while waiting for the laundry room to open. that's just me... eating pancakes when i should be thinking about how i'm going to fit in my clothes for the coming cruise.
anyways, let me be random and tell you about some stuff.
*i got my flu shot the other day, finally. after days of not being able to make it to the flu shot stations by the hospital lobby i can finally brave the flu season. the weird thing is that two days after the shot i am battling it out with the cold. so now my nasal passages are filled with snot and i feel bad for my major contribution to the killing of trees by using loads and loads of tissues.
*yesterday i drove joyce to her examination venue and showed her how easily irritated i can be. i feel sorry for joyce because she had to be a witness to my bad temper, i'm really sorry. however i wouldn't own up to all the fault. (start of vent)it was also magellan's (the navigator) mistake. if i weren't too dependent on him i would've yanked him off the windshield and thrown him off in the middle of I-195 in between the big ass trailer trucks with drivers who would give jeepney drivers in edsa a run for their money. i mean, i'm ok with being lost so long as were lost on a leisurely drive complete with beautiful scenery around, but i sure as hell have a problem with being lost in the middle of the interstate with those maniac trailer truck drivers threatening to claim my life. hayup na drivers kayo, napapamura ako sa inyo! good thing joyce was with me so i had to restrain my mouth, otherwise i would've been cursing like a pirate. so magellan, the next time we go on a road trip again, don't tell me to keep left when i'm not supposed to because i might just throw you in the middle of the freakin' road. (end of vent)
*9 days to go and we well be on our way to our very first carribean cruise. woohoo! happiness na ito!!!
i waited for the elevator at the lobby and realized today is a sunday when i saw the old man who ushers for the church mass every sunday. he greeted me a good morning and i warned him about the nasty weather outside.
as the elevator was taking me up to the fifth floor, i wondered what the hell happened to autumn?
it's not the physical aspect of work that makes it a bitch but the people i work with that doesn't make it all worth it. but i guess i'm half thankful it is how it is, at least i don't get paranoid. you see i'm like that. when everything's nice and peachy and it seems that nothing can go wrong, believe me...something will go wrong (based on my experience). yep, there goes the proverbial murphy's law trying to screw with my mind. so i'd take things like this just to keep life interesting. sometimes life here get's too boring it lulls me to sleep.
but as they say, such is life. sometimes you're there up in the stratosphere... next thing you know, you're down in the dumps that no amount of zoloft can pull you out from. gosh, i'm talking about depression and it's not even winter yet! what is wrong with me? this is the reason why there are things called carribean cruises so that people like me would have something to look forward to and would stop whining about being so bored.
so in 4 weeks, we'd be out there enjoying the warm sunshine while the rest of the east coast is preparing to bundle up.
i actually think about things a lot. before going to bed, while taking a shower, during a caloric burning session on the treadmill... i think about things a lot it's not even funny.
on a totally unrelated matter, have you guys ever tried sitting through my bestfriend's wedding and when harry met sally back to back? i tell you, it is not for the faint of heart. if your hydration status is not something you'd be proud of, do not... i repeat, do not attempt this feat because dehydration usually follows after crying your eyes out like a chinese mourner. but of course, i exaggerate.
i watched those two films just recently for the bazillionth time and it never fails to put me in a bleak mood. through the years of watching these films, i found that i've been rooting for julia roberts' character all the more and that i've envied sally albright (meg ryan's character) for the longest time for finding harry burns.
anyways, i've been in the city again a few days ago and i realized that going to new york somehow recharges my suburban batteries. as usual in typical new york fashion, we did a lot of walking again and guess who decided to grace us with her presence on the sidewalk while we were on our way to central park?
me and joyce posing with american idol fantasia barrino
this baby's mom had a hard time taking the picture because the baby wouldn't look at her camera and was instead looking on our direction. in the end she had to ask somebody to take both their picture on the same spot i was sitting on.
this is what "the mall" looks like post summer pre autumn time. this is where they shot maid in manhattan and joyce and i were wondering which of those benches jlo sat on during the shoot.
after the leisurely walk in central park, we hurried back to times square to catch the 7pm show of the wedding singer. yes the movie is now in broadway and it is 10 times more fun seeing it on the stage. the music is fun and upbeat and the cast was not a letdown. they did quite a bit of change on the end part though but it wasn't bad. instead of the real billy idol on the plane, they had a group of impersonators (channeling billy idol, mr. t, tina turner, cindy lauper and imelda marcos!) witness julia and robbie's vegas wedding. i really enjoyed it. it's one of those broadway plays that i wouldn't mind seeing over and over again.
here's something i found on youtube. nope i'm not the one singing but i wish i was that good.
I wanna make you smile whenever you're sad
Carry you around when your arthritis is bad
All I wanna do is grow old with you.
I'll get your medicine when your tummy aches.
Build you a fire if the furnace breaks
Oh it could be so nice, growin old with you.
I'll miss you, kiss you, give you my coat when you are cold.
Need you, feed you, and even let you hold the remote control.
So let me do the dishes in our kitchen sink
Put you to bed when you've had too much to drink.
Oh I could be the man who grows old with you.
ROBBIE & JULIA
I'll miss you, kiss you, take your shoes off and rub your feet.
Need you, feed you, and when we play checkers i'll let you cheat.
So let me do the dishes in our kitchen sink
Put you to bed when you've had too much to drink.
Oh I could be the one who grows old with you.
I wanna grow old with you.
moving on to other things. how is it that that a lot more plans are being made for fun things now that fall is on it's way? like the concert in mohegan sun that joyce, gina, me and a couple of morristown girls are scheduled to go to. i'm sure it's gonna be a blast, add to that the plans of a broadway show in new york or maybe the us open. it's all gonna be good.
speaking of the us open, joyce and i enjoyed watching a really exciting game early this afternoon, courtesy of rafael nadal and luis horna and as i am wont to do, i rooted for the underdog horna even if i knew nadal had the game in the bag. needless to say nadal won in the fourth set but not without a fight from horna who had the spectators do a standing ovation on one of the awesome rallies of the game. now if only i could find time to watch roger federer and james blake do their thing on the court, i would die a happy woman... he he he.
now let me talk to you about movies because i haven't seen any good movies lately. that's right, i've never been inside a cinema for the last three months. lately i've become the stingy lady who would haul quite a number of dvds from the public library's collection because it doesn't cost a thing (just a few cents worth of gas). but i came upon a trailer of the movie stranger than fiction and boy oh boy! did it look promising. it has a very strong all star cast that includes will ferell, emma thompson, dustin hoffman and maggie gyllenhaal among others. i'm just curious because i know chuck palahniuk (author of fight club, invisible monsters) wrote a non fiction book of the same title and i'm not sure if there would be any problems regarding intellectual property rights and stuff.
anyway, here's a preview of the movie:
it's gonna be released in november, so that is something i'm gonna be looking forward to this fall.
what can i say, other than it so typical of "you" guys to be resorting to that. was that the lowest you can get? or should i be expecting more of those pathetic acts.
three words: get a life!
ps.... the "wahihihikhik" gave it away dumbasses.
but i guess i am digressing from the main thing that we came to massachusetts for. i should be telling you about the whitewater rafting that we did for the first time (at least for dichi, dennis and i). i should tell you about how we impressed people at how sync we are with our paddling. i should tell you about how our guide (jack) felt so lucky for having such a wonderful crew to paddle with. i just felt sorry for the old man for getting stuck with a bunch of hard headed, adrenalin powered crew who wouldn't ease down on the paddling on his orders. you should've heard senen ask: "jack, can we go there?"..."jack, can we surf that rock?"... "jack, is this the gap?" several times like a kid with ADHD who hasn't had his dose of ritalin for the day...he he he (ing-ana siya kakulit!)
in the end, amidst achy limbs and backs...despite the sleepless nights...after the rush to the airport to catch flights...the five of us reluctantly go back to work. waaah! i'm already missing you guys! thank you for the good times. until the next trip!
for more pictures please go to my multiply.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
to senen: you were a wonderful host. thank you for letting us raid your room and for making us smoothies for breakfast. i will always remember you everytime i see "silky-silky" bedsheets and duvets.
so any suggestions on a good excuse for calling out sick? i will definitely need one.
number 1: you are not my favorite person at the moment.
number 2: i am trying my best not to say something bad about you out of my really, really straightforward mouth.
number 3: you are hitching a ride and your precious life is at the mercy of my driving skills.
good thing i love cuervo so much that i would rather see "pseudofriends" unscathed than give him multiple dents on his macho body.
it used to be that "makulit" is a cute thing to be. well it has lost it's novelty for me. word of advice: do not mess with me when you're not ready for the consequences because the bitch in me might just be a little too keen to resurface.
10. you start making crank calls from the phone in the operating room.
9. you figure out how to reprogram the new ekg monitor and set a new world record score for pong.
8. using discarded glove wrappers and saline bottles, you have created a mixed media replica of the eiffel tower.
7. you page a medical student intern to the OR STAT and tell her you need her to get a hamburger and fries for each member of the surgical team.
6. you vow that you will smash the cd player with a traction weight if you have to listen to the surgeon's favorite cd one more time.
5. you have a paper airplane war with anesthesia, using parts of the old chart.
4. suddenly, anesthesia's jokes are actually funny.
3. you turn the thermostat up to 80 degrees just to see if it will get the surgeon to operate any faster.
2. you invent a new game called "specimen, specimen, who's got the specimen?"
1. you come up with a humor list called "Top Ten Signs That This Surgery is Taking Too Long..."
- i miss my post board volunteer days with 6 strangers that i eventually ended up to be good friends up until now.
- i miss those times we (the girls) fought over who gets to scrub in on dr. angala's cases, just because dr. angala is so good looking behind those green consultant's mask.
- i miss the smell of burnt flesh everytime the surgeon is cauterizing bleeders and tissues.
- i miss seeing internal body parts, the peristaltic movements of the stomach and the intestines, the beating of a heart inside a rib cage, mangled omentums, amputated limbs, broken bones being put together again, kidneys, spleens, uterus, name it. now i am officially a gross person.
- i miss playing the game "i've got the better cautery machine than the bitchy nurse!" because i work in a government hospital, we have to make do with hospital equipment that suck and most of the time nurses try to compete on who gets to have first dibs on the better working equipment, but it's fun anyway.
- i miss the hemostats, the allises, the babcocks, mixters, scalpels, army navys, deavers, richardsons, rib spreaders, heanys, bulldogs, metz and mayo, t and ts, periosteal elevators, burrs and a partridge in a pear tree.
- i miss those days when we would request for anesthesia not to schedule a case every 5 o'clock or was it 5:30 pm because we wanted to catch meteor garden on tv. dao ming su!!!!
- i miss bossing the anesthesiologists to get their sleepy butts up because a stat gsw is being wheeled in.
- i miss counting the sponges, instruments and needles.
- i miss folding those damn operating sponges during downtimes.
- i miss the effects of inhaling too much nitrous...ha ha ha adik!
- i miss setting up my cd player before scrubbing in for a really long case.
- i miss the feeling at the end of a case where the surgeon is suturing up and i'm thinking "i can finally have lunch at 3 pm."
- i miss working with our surgeons back then.
in short.....i miss being in my element.
the first movie i watched was sex and lucia (lucia y el sexo) and oh my freakin god! paz vega was hot! hot! hot! it was a movie about a waitress (lucia) who got involved with a writer (lorenzo) who had a one night stand with a woman (belen) in an island on his birthday which resulted to a cute girl named luna (hingal!). of course there are more characters and most of them are connected to each other in some weird way and the hard part of watching this movie was not knowing if what's happening is part of lorenzo's novel or in fact a reality but that's what makes this film appealing.
now let's go korean with the film il mare. everybody knows that this is the film where they based the just released movie the lake house which stars sandra bullock and keanu reeves. i haven't really seen the lake house yet and i'm not sure if it still on the theaters as i type, but i sure hope to god that they didn't ruin the movie. i loved the fact that ji-hyun jun was not her usual my sassy girl self, it was so refreshing to see her in a sensitive non-astig role. speaking of my sassy girl, let me just post the "ten rules" which was my favorite part of the movie.
anyway here's what ang lee has to say about his film:
"Everything is much different in Eat Drink Man Woman than the other films I've made. It has a bigger cast and a lot more complex story line... I started thinking about families and how they communicate. Sometimes the things children need to hear most are often the things that parents find hardest to say, and vice versa. When that happens, we resort to ritual. For the Chu family, the ritual is the Sunday dinner... At each dinner the family comes together and then something happens that pushes them farther apart."
here's hoping that he makes more movies, especially after his infamous and well acclaimed brokeback mountain.
"There are three things a person can't hide... coughing, poverty and love. The harder one tries to hide them, the more they rise to the surface."
"We're tormented because love goes on... not because it goes away.
waaaaaah! i wanna bawl my eyes over these quotes. tell me, why did i have to watch that movie again?
another lazy sunday that never was lazy in my opinion. i woke up at 9 in the morning after only 4 hours of sleep. i never really had any concrete plans for this day except for hannie and i to hear mass on a church we've never been to before which is a 45 minute drive from home. the 45 minutes became an hour and a half no thanks to my penchant for being lost on the interstate. needless to say we never arrived in time for the mass. but we had fun anyway.
after the whole getting lost on the way to church thing, we decided to go to sesame place where some of the guys we know are spending their weekend. so off to sesame place we go.
on my way to where the air is sweet
how to get to sesame street ?
friendly neighbors there, that's where we meet
how to get to sesame street?
going to this place made me reminisce on my sesame street watching days. although i'm more of a batibot kid when i was in grade one, i also had my dose of sesame street on some mornings. although most kids are a fan of elmo nowadays, i still like the more vintage characters like grover, the count, the fat blue guy, big bird (how phallic!), oscar the grouch (who is only 10% grouchier than me), guy smiley and of course ernie and bert (who were rumored to be homosexuals...gasp!).
it was all good. i never did a lot of driving than i did on this entire day. now i'm all exhausted and ready to drift off to la la land. i wouldn't be surprised if someone hears me sing "c is for cookie...that's good enough for me..." in my sleep. until the next post.
>>> o <<<
this post is brought to you by the letters F, U and N and the number 1.
anyway, let me tell you the last thing i did for the first time. i went out and watched a movie by myself. yep, you heard it right...by myself. now, i've done this in pinas loads of times but not in these united states. so 3 days ago i had nothing better to do than sulk in the living room and watch those big ass mansions shown on mtv cribs when i realized i haven't seen a movie in weeks. so off i went to the theaters and watched the eight o'clock screening of cars and loved every minute of it. there i was, a 29 year old kid at heart with my nachos and soda, sitting in the middle of the movie theater surrounded by kids with their mom, kids with their dad, kids with their mom and dad among others. i definitely had fun being alone to say the least.
now on to the movie... cars like any other pixar movie was an eye candy with lovable characters like the hippie volkwagen van fillmore, the italian fiat luigi and his sidekick guido and of course who wouldn't love mater for his body? i mean...come on...he he he... watching this movie made me wish for cuervo (my CRV) to spring to life and have his own character and say those witty lines said in the movie. if that happens, i would have a heart attack.
ok, gotta get back to cleaning the apartment.
today me and one of my housemate went to buy some provisions for the house and decided to watch a movie. (aside: i mentioned that i was going to watch united 93 on my last post...well i did and i cried buckets of tears (exxage!)... i loved the movie but hated the fact that a couple of americans most probably in their 50's were giggling by the time the credits were rolling. insensitive. yes. end aside.)
anyway, upon learning that we had an hour an fifteen minutes to kill before the movie starts we decided to make tambay (how conio!) at borders. like i always do these days when i go to borders i, i got nick hornby's paperback of a long way down and settled myself on one of the couches by the cd shelves. after an hour i was halfway through the book. to nick hornby fans, i suggest you secure yourself a copy. it's an interesting book about 4 strangers facing varied kinds of problems who decided to end their life on the same night atop the same building. it's funny and sad with the usual hornby humor that people learned to love. i'd still have a couple more trips to borders before i finish it though...he he he.
now on to some things that i am contemplating about. o di ba? contemplating...big word. akala mo kung ano nang major life changing decision ang pinagiisipan ko he he. actually i'm just thinking if i should buy a guitar and continue to get frustrated about learning to play or give myself a bonk in the head and stop procrastinating about my pediatric certification application. basta i'm getting lazy these days that my mails have been piling up on my desk. i want to be always up and about, to do things this summer, to learn something new, to go places, to be on two places at the same time with enough energy to spare....alam nyo yon? i just wanna make the most out of every minute of my day and the exact opposite is happening. can somebody hand me a redbull?
speaking of movies, i am excited to see the movie united 93 ever since it stirred a lot of talks after it was previewed at the tribeca film festival. i heard a lot of people were speechless and in tears after seeing the movie. i'm going to try and catch it after the weekend.
i am currently keeping my fingers crossed that G's schedule will fall into place so that our planned florida trip would happen. i have already set aside six days for the trip and hoping that i'd have enough budget to spend those six days on what they call the happiest place on earth. ano pa nga ba, eh di disneyland! the possibility of not going still looms on the horizon and i'd be totally disappointed if we wouldn't be able to go but the money i would save by not going would be most welcome.
so, whatever happens...happens.
anyways, i thought that 4 weeks of vacation was enough for me. was i ever wrong! this vacation made me realize that i could use up all my PTO's, my holiday time offs and add to that the days on my extended sick bank and it would still not be enough for me. i am like torn between wanting to stay in davao and yearning to be back to the life that i'm beginning to get used to in america. *sigh* i guess we can't have the best of both worlds.
now on to the things that i miss...
i miss playing with my nephew. i miss when he would convince me to stay in their room and play with him and his numerous toys and when i'd get tired of playing, he would become this relentless little boy who would convince me to play some more as if i was the best playmate ever.
i miss the pandesal nights when we would be trying our hands out at piling pandesal dough on trays and the days that en-en and i would spend tending the mini bakery thinking of hilarious names for breads such as "choco something", "pan de cheverlu" and "cheesy chuvaness", among others.
i miss hanging out with my cousins be it at the beach playing labo-labo billiards.
at the arcade hogging all the bumpcars for ourselves and irritating the guy manning the controls.
or even at the memorial park hanging out with our departed "mamay".
i can't believe how grown up some of my cousins have become. some have actually graduated from college and have their own jobs now, while the others have moved on to college. these guys are the ones that used to hog our computer playing counter strike and starcraft whenever we have family gatherings in the house. now they talk about their lovelives or the lack thereof over redhorse and chichacorn.
these little things i miss. the constant interaction with the people i've grown up with and the people who are growing up, with me missing the fun of it all. i guess it's the principle of giving up one thing for another. we can't have it all. that best explains it.
i believe i am getting senti again, so i better end this post now.
when i was in high school, the only TAPS i knew was the one on ilustre street or what is now known as duterte street. when i got to college and during my stint in davao medical center, more TAPS came about on different streets in davao city. i never knew that there was a branch now in matina where MTS is located and things haven't changed much.
anyway, TAPS has been serving "silogs" way before kiddie meals and happy meals were available in davao city. wala pa'y jollibee og mcdo niadtong mga panahona. that is why eating at TAPS that night kinda made me remember my high school days when we would troop over to the ilustre branch and order whatever "silog" we fancy just right after window shopping at gaisano ilustre.
so while waiting for our orders of lekasi (lechon kawali at sinangag) and primasilog (pritong manok, sinangag at itlog), my sister and i amused ourselves at the rest of the "silogs" on their menus.
me: miss unsa man nang tatosi?
waitress: tapa, tosino at sinangag.
sister: aw, abi nako'g naay libre tatoo samtang gakaon ta'g sinangag.
(katawa pud mo uy!)
digression aside, the thing that caught my fancy while we were dining at TAPS was their ad poster for what they call "ang utan na kayang bayaran". the intended pun surely didn't miss me.
Sweet Pikol Express
P10 lang - ang utan na kayang bayaran
Ang bag-ong pampagana sa TAPS nga tag-P10 lang: Pickled cucumber, onion, ampalaya, carrot & ubod. Tam-isun ug aslumun... makapaspas ug kaon!
things like these crack me up, but it surely makes me wanna be home more often.
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(also posted on Bisaya Bloggers)
this will be short and sweet.
people have differences. people have different priorities. my main priority maybe on the lowest rung of the ladder for some people but that's MY main priority, not yours. time is of value to me but if it doesn't mean anything to you, i respect that but just don't expect people to keep on tolerating it and move around their schedules just to accomodate you on a whim because some people would, other people wouldn't give a rat's ass.
but that's water under the bridge. i don't dwell on "teenage-immature-i-wouldn't-talk-to-you-stuff" because that would just be plain stupid. the world is too little for us not to bump into each other and bearing grudges is not my cup of tea.
on to the better part.
six days to go and i'm gonna be on board singapore airlines to be back to my native land of failed coup attempts. it's sad to come home to a state of emergency, but i'd take it any day if only for the fact that i'd be able to spend time again with my family.
so on the times that i don't update my blog, know in mind that i am counting the days til....
"come here, take a look. it's on CNN." she called to me.
and there it was on the patient's tv set... the wowowee anniversary stampede. such a sad way to realize that a lot of filipinos remain poor and that they would do anything, queue for hours even days and not mind if they end up hurting each other just to have a stab at luck.
if we come to think of it was abs-cbn really at fault for creating a show that promotes a culture of "pamamalimos" that dangling prizes of instant wealth and other promising stuff that would make life a bit easier have stirred up more hunger from most of these deprived people?
it's just really really sad.
we were able to find a link to the RMN station doing a live coverage of the match. it sucks to be at work when all the guys at the apartment are over at ed and chris' house enjoying PPV on HBO. anyway, imagine our disappointment when the guys at RMN decided to stop live coverage because some network was probably waving EXCLUSIVITY to their faces. so we made do with some internet forum where somebody was patient enough (god bless his soul!) to give a blow by blow account of the match.
and so after 10 rounds, pacquiao won by TKO! clarisse called up her husband who was at the pay-per-view party and we heard how loud they've become because of the pacman's victory. i called up my sister in pinas to check if they already knew. she wouldn't believe me when i said that it was pacquiao with a TKO on the tenth round. apparently, the solar sport's channel that they were watching was still on the second round. sabi ko sa kanya sabihin kay tatay na humanap ng kapustahan.... he he he... you never know, somebody might still be up for a bet at that time.
so the philippines has again triumphed. i heard that politicians on different sides of the fence had set aside their diffrences in support of manny pacquiao. how sweet! (with matching rolling of the eyes) if they can be that passionate in their support for a sport that brings pride to the philippines, i just wish that they give the same amount of passion in doing what they are supposed to do for the country.
i went to the bank this morning with my housemates jade and joyce to have some dollar bills changed into quarters for that household chore we couldn't get away from that we call the laundry. i parked on the side street beside the bank and completely ignored the parking meter on the right side of my truck as i made my way to the atm machine. i knew i should've used more braincells at that moment because when i came back from the bank with two rolls of quarters in my hand, there underneath the windshield wipers is a crisp yellow parking ticket reminding me of my stupidity. dammit! there goes my 18 bucks faster than i can say kaching!
so what have i been up to lately? i've been on a reading spree the last week. i was able to finish reading memoirs of a geisha before i went to the mall to catch it's film version and have finished terry mcmillan's how stella got her groove back which ultimately got me out of the foul winter mood i'm in these days. i have also been calling travel agencies for plane ticket prices because apparently i am going back home in march! so after a weeks of wheeling and dealing with travel agents it's gonna be singapore airlines for me baby!
another thing that's keeping me up all night when i am not up all night because of work is the new sims university expansion pack that i've installed in my laptop. it kinda revived my addiction to the sims 2. it's fun because my sims get to write term papers or better yet influence someone to write term papers for them, choose majors, apply for fraternities and sorrorities, choose to live alone or live in a crazy dorm, schmooze with professors and recite these funny sounding school cheers.
can you tell how i easily get bored these days? i've finished watching the season 4 dvd of friends last night, i watched charlie and the chocolate factory, christmas with the kranks and some hilary duff movie all in one sitting the other day courtesy of my friend's netflix subscription. she was supposed to get million dollar baby and some other dvd's today but when i went to get it out of the mailbox, the mailbox was empty and a note said that all our mails are in the apartment building's office probably because we got a shitload of junk mails that wouldn't fit into their tiny mailboxes. so i am left with nothing to watch tonight except for maybe reruns of conan o'brien (he totally cracks me up!) or some paid tv advertisement like girls gone wild (joke!)
so there, i'll post another update if something more exciting happens to my life like say i get another parking ticket or if my sims gets twins the next time they have a baby. sad, sad life, i know.
Find the first entry for each month of 2005 in your blog. Post the first line of it in your journal, and that’s your "Year In Review"(note: songs, announcements, surveys and blogthings do not count. they should all be legitimate journal entries):
January: i survived the holidays!
February: can somebody please slow down the time? i am running around like a mad woman here (or maybe not, but i just feel like i am) in between trying to get ready for my coming trip to pinas, meeting up my old friends from way way back and juggling two jobs.
March: because i only have 2 more full years left to have the right to claim that i am a twenty something person, let me share with you this article which had been in my inbox for a long time.
April: and so the three weeks of sheer escapism came and went. i've been really bad with blogger lately. i know it's a sin if you've got thousands of things to blog about but you don't find the time to sit down and put all those fun and memorable times into written words.
May: i've been meaning to post this entry a month ago, but between all the preparations for the vacation (that was over even before i got used to the fact that i was on one) and my work which i gladly left for a while and halfheartedly coming back to, i obvously didn't have the time.
June: i just had a dream. i dreamt that i lost my key to our mailbox and i couldn't get any of my mails which happens to be all bills of credit cards, cellphone, utilities etc.
July: it's amazing how one small thing can change my whole disposition amidst sore throat, fever and cough.
August: first things first, let me tell you why i haven't come up with an update these past few weeks. the reason is this fact: "nakakasira ng buhay blogger ang trabaho at lakwatsa."
September: WARNING: a really, really long post coming up, filled with lots and lots of pictures enough to satisfy my up coming vacationless autumn and winter so help me god!
October: i was listening to the radio one night (which i seldom do because most of the radio stations here suck anyway) and out of the blue they played the song all i want is you by U2.
November: so halloween is over and done with. what comes next is thanksgiving. but before that let me just tell you about the halloween party that we had.
December: dear santa,
how was your year? i hope you didn't worked too hard. you're not getting any younger you know.